If you'd like to know what I've been up to lately, my answer for you would be a lot of clearing--clearing up my schedule, clearing up my head, clearing up my future and, of course, clearing up the mantel to make room for the wreath and all the ceramic Santa Clauses. One thing I have not been doing, however, is clearing up the negativity.
The time is shortly upon us. Before we know it, we'll be (sadly) hauling out the boxes to pack up all the glitter and sparkle that has left my eyes twinkling for the past two weeks. In no time, we will have nothing ahead of us to look forward to besides a distant spring and another round of the brutalest of the winter months to battle. How are you using the little amount of festivity we have left on our calender? I'm using every free minute I have to celebrate the season--whether it be a Christmas tablecloth-shopping trip with my mom, or a catch up lunch with one friend followed by a catch up dinner with another, a girls' night in, a girls' night out, a gingerbread-house-building challenge, a baking session (or two, or three), Christmas-themed weekly chocolate surprises for my boyfriend, neighbourhood Christmas lights decoration gazing or anything else I come up with. But what I must say I have yet to done enough of is give back to someone who is extremely important, yet so often forgotten, so often looked down upon, so often punished and so often someone I find myself shaking my finger at, shaking my head at in disappointment--and that someone is me.
When change happens gradually it is often hard to see just how far you have come, just how much progress you have made. For me, that is my greatest challenge--it is something I struggle with everyday, every hour and especially at every meal time and snack time. I won't deny that I have done well--when I want to generalize--but on a daily basis I seem to find it easier and easier to overlook my triumphs and dwell on my slip-ups. Maybe it's the dreary weather, or the extra holiday treats I have been indulging in, but lately I can't seem to shake that icky gross feeling of insecurity that I have been plagued with for the majority of my past.
But today I am in clearing mode. And I am ready to clear away the ugly thoughts. And why shouldn't I? After almost ten years of sweat and tears, of good days and bad weeks, of losses and gains, of boredom slumps and reenergizing boosts, I can finally say I am happy where I have ended up. I have reached and exceeded so many goals. I am smarter now than ever before, wiser than I was, more educated and healthier as a result. Today I will not look over every imperfection with disgust. Tomorrow I will not punish myself for an extra chocolate square here or a well-deserved glass of wine there.
If the imminent holidays have caught you in a frenzy to finish crossing off your shopping list, your over-time work hours have robbed you of your free-time or exams have made you forfeit any attempts you may have made to reconnect with friends and family, than at the very least take some time to appreciate you. Do one thing a day that puts you at risk to be transferred off of a certain someone's good list. Don't harp on the piece of chocolate bark you secretly gobbled last night, or the extra slice of cheesecake you had at your work Christmas party. This year, take the glass of eggnog for yourself and leave Santa the 1%. Don't read the article that tells you 'which foods to avoid this holiday season'--instead only avoid the ones that don't leave your mouth watering and your stomach grumbling. Forget about portion control but don't forget that red wine is good for your heart. Keep in mind that the season is for generosity, for giving, for friends and family, but don't leave yourself in the dust.
Another year has almost come and gone. Think about how much you have done in these twelve short months. Remember every challenge you have faced--whether it be a seemingly impossible essay topic, a fight with a friend, recovering from a broken relationship or adapting to something new and foreign. If your hectic schedule leaves you with only one minute to spare, this year, use it on you. You deserve it.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment